The city that gave me everything (part 4)

Again I closed  my eyes, performed my last prayer, bow my head again to seek for strength and tame my dragons so as to ignore him and I walked away .......... !! 

Sometimes we have everything in our lives except contentment. The quest for answers and peace took me to "Bangla Sahib Gurudwara". With a dupatta on my head, I submitted myself in the feet of that super power . I closed my eyes and burst into fresh bout of tears. I was alone in Gurudwara today without any friends. A flash back hit my mind like a storm. I clearly remember, how we used to go to Gurudwara in Chennai. There were two reasons behind it. Firstly we used to get "langar" ( a good Punjabi food, first offered to the God, then to devotees). Being a Punjabi, south India food was something hard to live on !
Secondly, it made us feel homely.  We used to meet people who belong to our community. Rawjyot, Kabir and I were constants. But today nobody was there with me.

It was raining that day when Kabir and I decided to go to Gurudwara while Rawjyot had already left the company for higher studies. On the way back to my hostel, the rain grew so intense that we decided to stay at Domino's for a while. We shared the same pizza silently. But the abrupt statement of Kabir was strong enough to shake me to the core !!
"I know you like me ! I can see you falling for me but trust me, I am not the right guy for you.",  Said Kabir out of somewhere.
I.... I....Kabir....ummmm...my brain stopped all of a sudden. I was struggling to collect words. "Relax !! Listen to me !! Look, I see you as a girl with whom I can start my family, who can be the best mother to my children but I can't hurt you !!
This is not I am looking for right now ! I already have a complex status with my ex-girlfriend. I don't want to be in the same mess again. I don't wanna fool around with you , because you are not meant for that !!

His naked words slammed on my face directly. I felt worse to know that he doesn't feel for me, but even more worse when I thought I lost a candid guy like him. No words were left in my mouth.

It's been two years now, and no memory has faded inside me. The more I try to run away from him, the more closer he comes to me. Kabir has been relocated in the same city in which I have been living. My every encounter with him leaves me wavy and sad.
I still can't stand when he talks to his girlfriend. I am still not sure whether his existence bothers me or not !
Again I closed  my eyes, performed my last prayer, bow my head again to seek for strength and tame my dragons so as to ignore him and I walked away .......... !!